Member-only story
Mother’s Day
Not mine…
I failed at being a mother; I excelled at being a drunk but in secret.
Giving birth was traumatic and anti-climatic.
I have not seen my daughter for over 9 years — her choice. Since she was twenty one and I gave her a silver tennis bracelet.
I drank in the after math of my divorce and lack of support. I genuinely do not know how I survived financially as I had no support from my ex-husband or parents but I brought up my daughter until she was 13, got her through all her exams with excellence, and she chose to leave.
My mother says it was my husband, my daughter told me I was the worst mother ever, but the point is I did not drink until she left. So why?
Why is it so hard to break up with the thing that snuck into your life almost without you noticing? It is like letting your bedroom or kitchen get untidy, it happens bit by bit and then you suddenly realise you have a big problem on your hands and there is a lot to deal with.
I have read hundreds of books on alcohol, alcoholism, memoirs of disaster and redemption, how to moderate, not drink, be sober, you name it I have read it. As a bonus to this book I shall curate the best titles for you so you don’t have to waste as much time as I did.
